Almonds in a Haystack. At first glance you see almonds covering a white substance. I assumed it was Cool Whip…almonds, sweetness, this can’t be bad. Then I realized it was Miracle Whip. Not even real mayonnaise. And what was that bulk of stuff in the middle? It’s hard to read, but I have deduced what that all actually says:
- 4 C. finely chopped ham
- 8 oz. cream cheese
- 3/4 C. Miracle Whip
- 1/3 C. sliced green onions
- 1/4 C. pickle relish
- Slivered almonds
I should admit that I was aided in my sleuthing by the fact that not one, but TWO different websites have the recipe printed. Cooks.com (the source of endless bad recipes) wasn’t a surprise. The surprise was a site called ‘Living with Energy in Iowa.’ Being originally from Iowa, I find this horrifying.
When I originally found this, on Buzzfeed in their ’10 Regrettable Retro Food Recipes’, it claimed the original source as “Bad & Ugly Retro Recipes.“ I don’t know if I missed it or if the author has removed it, but I didn’t find it in any post…and I went through all of them. I’m very careful to credit the original source.
The picture is also featured on ‘Fine Fettle Guide.’ It didn’t credit a source. But it’s picture includes a white spot carried on every single picture on the internet. I also found the picture on ‘MeTV‘, which said they got it from the ‘Messy Nessy Chic,’ who said she got it from Pinterest. When I clicked on the Pinterest link, it led me a pin…of the MeTV article. So someone is that loop is confused. Since the only source that makes actual sense is Bad & Ugly, I suggest giving them a visit if you have time. They have a ton of horrible vintage recipes.
I have to admit I found a version of this recipe on another site. But it wasn’t billed as a horrible vintage recipe. The author says she likes it. I’ll give her credit- her pictures look MUCH better than the one in the ad above. And described as kind of a “ham salad sandwich” I can kind of see it. I won’t be making it any time in the future. Thanks for ‘Sassy Spoon‘ for the images below. Please visit for other pictures as well as the recipe.
As always, check out more ‘Insane Vintage Recipes‘ and ‘Vintage Ads‘ (mostly sexist) on their respective pages.
If you have one for either category, let me know. I would love to feature it.
I found your site actually LOOKING for this recipe. 😆 I too, grew up in Iowa, and this was something my mom made for parties.. it is surprisingly good, and I don’t even really like ham. We were not a Miracle whip household, so she used regular mayo. I now live on the other side of the world, and found myself thinking about making this recipe, affectionately dubbed “ham shit” by our family. Even my niece, who’s a well known pastry chef in New Orleans, has served it in sandwiches at her bakery/ cafe. Give it a try, you just might like it. 😊 Thanks for the recipe!
NO! I can’t believe it. Well, I’m glad you found the recipe you were looking for. I can KIND OF see the ham and mayo in a sandwich. Still not sure about eating it with the almonds. Thanks for commenting and enjoy your “Almonds in a Haystack” when you make it.
I found this recipe (exact one you show) in a popular magazine probably 35 years ago. It was my number 1 hit for an appetizer to bring to get-together. Everyone wanted the recipe. I kept it a secret for years till a Non-Profit I am part of published a cook book for a fundraiser and I included the recipe. The picture is cute for the “Haystack” view, but it looks different when you really mix a part of the cream cheese and Mayo/or Miracle Whip in with the ham. The Slivered Almonds are also part of the greatness of the recipe. You chop up part of the Slivered Almonds and mix them in with the ham. It is absolutely wonderful served with crackers or bruschetta bread.
It’s interesting to hear from someone who has had it. It must be one of those “tastes better than it sounds” things?